Half the Battle is Managing Your Own Ego
π We all have an ego. It is our friend. It keeps us safe by scouting for danger. It’s why we aren’t extinct as a species. Humans are very good at protecting themselves.
π¦ Except mastodons and primitive tribes aren’t walking the earth today.
(I realize there are people in corporate cultures who may take exception to this.) π
π¨ When we allow our ego to think doubt is danger, anxiety unfolds.
π§ Worry is a symptom of anxiety.
π Worry destroys peace and relationships.
Worry shows up as:
β‘οΈ Distancing from people you care about
β‘οΈ Shame
β‘οΈ Intimidation
β‘οΈ Insecurity
β‘οΈ Playing small
β‘οΈ Overcompensating
β‘οΈ Assumptions
β‘οΈ Victimhood
β‘οΈ Expectations
β‘οΈ Lack of purpose
β‘οΈ No intention
β‘οΈ Lack of intimacy
β‘οΈ Confrontational
Here’s what it sounds like in your head:
π€ “I better speak just so I can be noticed.”
π€ “He always picks on me.”
π€ “I don’t want to draw attention because what if I’m wrong?”
π€ “I’ll never get a better job.”
π€ “I don’t know what I’ll do in retirement so I better keep working.”
π€ “Should I be doing something more important?”
π€ “I work really hard and never get promoted. There’s something wrong with me.”
The problem with worry is that it is a thought based on a flawed assumption to begin with. So we take action on that assumption and become even more deflated when things don’t change.
The magic comes when you learn how to define the real fear your wounded ego has been running from (note all the arrowed behaviors above that follow a wounded ego), and draw on a personal practice that creates an opening for belief in yourself, and clarity.
The result?
β Closer relationships
β Effectiveness
β Courage
β Listening
β Vision
β Intention
β Confidence
β Excitement
β Purpose
β Intimacy
β Love
β Inclusiveness
β Fulfillment
π This happens! I see it everyday.
If this resonates with you here is a link to a short survey to set up a conversation so we can see how this will work for you. I look forward to hearing your story.
βοΈ Success is freedom. Not more worry.
The Still Space Podcast - #40 How to Be The Agile Leader – When You’re Not Sure How. In this episode Mary Lee unravels what it is to be an agile leader, how to manage yourself in the areas that don’t come naturally to you. She explains how a team mantra or manifesto can become the guide that grounds everyone and that a carefully balanced system of agility and stability lends itself to efficacy. Humility is key. Listen wherever you listen to podcasts or here: Mary Lee’s website Apple Spotify
If you are feeling age discrimination when your company should be putting your expertise to good use, this link to the strategies I share with my clients might help >>> 10 Tips When You Fear Age Bias
Your coach,
Mary Lee
P.S. Feel free to send this link to someone who could benefit from it. We are all walking down the same road in life looking for a hand to hold. Sometimes we must be the hand that reaches out.
Mary Lee Gannon, ACC, CAE is an executive coach and 19-year corporate CEO who helps leaders have more effective careers, happier lives and better relationships. Request a consultation call.
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