This Week My Clients Are Struggling With This
As I look back on the challenges my clients are dealing with this week I see two common themes - difficult people and lack of clarity.
First, people are difficult for one reason - they are insecure and unhappy. That shouldn't become your problem, but often difficult people exude what looks like confidence. This gets them promoted to high level positions. That perceived confidence is a smoke screen to hide what is behind the sand they kick up. Underneath they feel unqualified, ineffective and ultimately that they may lose respect, their job and be alone. Knowing this your goals are:
- Consistently, make sure they know you have their back even though they will never have yours.
- Be in alignment with what they value. "Since I know this is important to you......."
- Stay off their radar screen. Don't play into their chaos. Don't meet with them unless necessary. Give them choices as it underscores their power. Don't posture to be favored. Let others live in the chaos.
- If...
When You Aren't Sure What To Do
New SMART Leaders ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS. You know that risk you’re avoiding because it makes you uncomfortable and you’re really unsure about what will happen if you take it? Maybe you should pay attention to that.
Get curious about it. Is now the right time? What would change if you waited another month? Is it really an either or choice? What other options might there be? Who might be good counsel on this? How can you be gentle with yourself as you vet the decision?
Trust your gut and ask questions. Your pinhole perspective will start to open. You’re head is too analytical and you heart is too emotional. Trust instinct and challenge assumptions. It’s how we’ve stayed alive as a species for centuries. It will serve you in doubt.
Check out my latest column for The Ladders - $100,000+ job site here.
Your coach,
Mary Lee
P.S. Feel free to send this link to someone who could benefit from it. We are all walking down the same road in...
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